The penultimate
day of our trip began with me tiptoeing up the stairs, in the wee hours of the
morning, four floors up to the dining room located on the terrace. Most of the
hotels/hostels, around the area had similar setups - cramped rooms,
mold-smelling sheets, terrace dining rooms, a superb view of the seaport and
free, unlimited tea. Dawn was just breaking and I had a mission at hand. Arming
myself with a strong cup of tea, a map that I had smartly pocketed from the
reception area and a guide that was already lying there, I proceeded to plan
out the day.
- TEA: Ready
- WiFi: Working
- WIFE: Sleeping
- GOOGLE MAPS: Open
- ETA: 1 hour
- OBJECTIVE: Infiltrate, shoot and kill all selfie stick owners in Istanbul and escape with minimum impact to the populace.
- ACTUAL OBJECTIVE: Plot the most optimal route across Istanbul for maximum coverage of locations
- ETA: 1 hour
- RISKS: Wife coming in and blasting me for (not) waking her up
- MITIGATION: Jump from the hotel roof, then later jump into the sea and swim back to India
- CONSULTANT MODE: Turned on. (not what you think, you dirty-minded... wash your brain with Henko)
ALL SYSTEMS GO!
All systems went and crashed.
So, as you know
Turkey is split into two main parts - the European side and the Asian side
split by the Bosphorus. Additionally, the European side is further split into
two more parts, by the Golden Horn. Harnessing all my years of MBA guile, I
planned to start from the easternmost part and gradually wind up on the west.
We were put on the westernmost side of Istanbul. Staying at Sultanahmet had its
benefits, most of the key sightseeing places were right next door and we would
be able to do them at any point during the next day. If you were unable to follow any of that, picture this - an idly cut into the shape of a samosa with sambhar running through it on one side and coconut chutney running on the other. If you were unable to picture this also, then please go wash a few vessels at Saravana Bhavan.
Or use google maps.
And so I began.
After an hour of
back-breaking work and 2 more cups of tea, there were squiggles all over the
map and the guide. I was proud of myself. It made NASA look like a bunch of
kindergarten students building a sandcastle out of dosa batter. And then I
promptly went back to sleep.
9:30 AM:
After a standard
Turkish breakfast of the staple food we had been having so far, we
started out. Boarding a tram to Topkapi (the other Topkapi station towards the
east of the city) we reached the place without any incident. The sun was out
and it was slightly hot. Stepping into the museum, we had no idea what was
there - it was just highly recommended somewhere in the guide. We had the first
of the many jaw-drops. The panorama 1453 is a 360 degree view of the entire
fall of Constantinople, painted on a massive dome. It was just plain
breathtaking. After spending half an hour or so, we left the place, dragging
our jaws.
10:40 AM:
We took a short
walk along the Byzantine City Walls ruins that we had just seen in the
Panoramic museum, clicking photos as and when and wherever possible.
The walk
was to lead us to Chora Church (Kariye museum) which we again reached without
further ado. The mosaics here are some of the best you will ever see in your
life (and I have been to Rome, as well). They have been restored well and here
is where we made the second best investment - the Museum pass.
TIP 1: Get the Museum pass as well. We worked out the math. Even if you were just visiting Topkapi palace, the Hagia Sofia and one other museum, the entire cost is recovered. Everything else is a bonus.
11:30 AM:
Time for a
break. We bought a couple of bottles of water and some talcum powder to battle
the heat. We had a long walk ahead of us. Navigating through the wall, we came
to a huge bridge spanning the Golden horn. We did not cross it of course, are
you mad? It was a highway, for God's sake.
We went further northeast, bound for one of the most beautiful camii's in Istanbul - the Eyüp Sultan Camii. It was huge and situated right next to a hill/on top of a smaller hillock, it offered a grand view of the city's spires. A fountain
spewed water listlessly outside. The place was jam packed with tourists,
worshippers and shopkeepers. Prayers were just starting; we bolted inside,
drank our view of the immense walls and roof and then bolted outside.
There was a sombre
graveyard, right next door that could be seen through a crisscrossed wrought
iron wall. We walked past it, to our next point.
12:30 PM:
From here, we
took the cable car. When I say we took the cable car, we mean we stood in the
goddamned queue for a couple of hours. Remember, the Istanbul Kart that we had? It worked here. The view, as the cable car took off, was astounding. The whole
of Istanbul, the skyline dotted with mosques, domes, pillars, buildings,
bridges and both the inlets shining in the sun like a coiled, sky blue snake.
One side of the hill was a cemetery. The cafe at the top of the hill had
nothing else, just a bunch of Nair tea stalls with chairs and posh looking
names. After a minor photo-shoot and a small walk into the cemetery, we returned
back.
1:45 PM:
We walked all
the way back from the base of the hill to the Eyüp ferry and took one to Eminönü.
This was the closest thing we came to doing a cruise and it was miles better.
Also cheaper.
Disembarking at Eminönü,
we were hungry. We walked along the bottom of the Galata Bridge that was
littered with several restaurants. I had a beer at one of them - they are
overpriced and offered nothing other than a view of the Golden Horn which you
can have anyway, by standing on the bridge.
The real deal was on the other
side.
3:45 PM:
We climbed over
on top of the bridge from the bottom and walked along the road. There were many
anglers, positioned all along the entire length. I was wondering where this
catch was going, when I saw it. Below, on the Karaköy side were the legendary
fish sandwich sellers. We immediately ordered one. The chap deftly deboned the
fish as it was getting grilled. Once it was fully cooked, he took a loaf of
bread, stuffed some vegetables, tossed some spices inside, placed the fish and
then handed it to us. We were already drooling enough to irrigate the Sahara.
And God, I have no words.
TIP 2: Fish sandwich! Fish sandwich! Fish sandwich!
I really have no
words. Not telling anything else. Go book your tickets to Turkey for this one
reason alone.
4:30 PM:
Now, we had
entered the more modern part of Istanbul and the first tram stop across the
Galata Bridge is Karaköy. As we strolled past the crowd, we ran into a Turkish
wedding. One of the best men, as we passed the rather colorful procession, was
reversing his car and bumped into another guy's car and a small brawl broke
out. I was very fondly reminded of Perungudi traffic signal. We then walked
through a narrow set of avenues, climbing up the Galata hill. Soon, we came
upon a set of paved roads that was crowded with small shops that peddled
souvenirs, with hipsters hanging about and a lot of tourists; something very
similar to tea stalls outside Ethiraj College. I was pretty sure I saw one guy
smoking up.
Suddenly, we saw a huge queue snaking upwards on the road. We
wondered what it was and followed. It went on for like a kilometre or so and
wound up around a tower - the Galata Tower that were bound for.
We gave up. Even
if we had started at the rear of the queue, by the time we reached the base of
the tower, my grandson would have kicked me in my groin.
Forward we
strode.
5:40 PM:
As the road came
to an end, we reached a huge centre that had a quaint tram standing in the
middle of it. We enquired and found that it was the first tram in Istanbul.
Just as we were taking pictures, it took off with a toot and a bell clanging
loudly. We walked to our next point of attraction, the Galata Mevlevi Museum.
The place was politely closed. Nah, we were not disappointed. We took this in
our stride. We have had worse disappointments in our life.
You better not
ask what they are. I will hunt you, kill you and feed you to the three-legged
yak I once had the misfortune to come across in Himachal Pradesh while driving
a broken TVS 50.
Anyways, we had
a show to catch.
6:00 PM
As we traced our
way back, we once again reached the point where we had seen the tram and here,
according to the map, there was a smaller route that went back to Karaköy.
We were
intrigued.
I found the
small, unassuming building which apparently housed the station, the map said.
As we walked towards, the tram bell pealed again behind and the passengers who
disembarked from there, came running towards us. I turned and just raised my
hand to say to that I am on a holiday and at the most, can sign a few
autographs, when they ran past me into the bowels of the building. I was stung
and turned once more to see my wife doubled up in glee. Then we walked to the
building and came to the first and probably the only underground station in
Istanbul.
It was not an
underground train; it was a funicular from Tünel to Beyoğlu which was right
next to Karaköy. IstanbulKart to the rescue once again! The ride was thrilling,
it felt like an amusement park ride. For kids. No it was not thrilling. But interesting,
nevertheless. The tracks went downward and then up, in a concave manner. We
reached without incident.
You can read
more about it here.
Now we were on
the clock. The show was at 7:30 PM
7:15 PM
We had returned
to the hotel, refreshed and were now back at the Sirkeci railway terminal. The station
was like any other railway station in any other town in any other country. A doleful
clerk directed us to the hall. There was a faint, silent murmur that hung in
the air within the hall. As we took our seats, we were offered a choice of teas
- apple and normal. We took one of each and sat sipping, as other aficionados
poured in. There was a huge wall hanging that had a single saying from Rumi. I contributed
to the murmur by trying to explain the significance of the ceremony.
The musicians
came in and the show started. It was more of a prayer than a show.
The prayer show
was good. It was not spectacular, but enthralling all the same. The musicians
sang off-key on purpose, the dancing was strained and one of them was actually
grinning/smiling throughout the ceremony. It made a mockery of us visitors, but
I cannot blame them entirely for vitiating. There were a couple of idiots who
were talking loudly and several more who were clicking with flashlight cameras.
May the free tea they drank, give them perpetual indigestion.
TIP 3: Book the show in advance. We did it the previous day. There is a very helpful site - click here. Select the closest location and confirm it.
9:00 PM
We came out
after the show, slightly enlightened and made our way to the bazaar right
outside the railway station where got our hands on a plate of Künefe with ice cream.
The mouth and the esophagus were treated to a grandstand view of paradise, as
we bit into the crunchy, chewy pudding with the ice cream melting all over it.
We soon walked
towards the spice market. It was closing and after having a prolonged,
analytical discussion that mostly involved my wife throwing a tantrum, we decided
to go through it the next day. This decision came back to bite me in the rear,
but later on that.
We scratched our
heads on what to do and to exercise the crap out of the massive calorie intake
we just had half an hour ago, we agreed to walk to another Camii nearby, the Süleymaniye
Camii.
10:00 PM
Eminönü was
still bustling with people at this late hour, but the road to the mosque was
deserted. We clambered uphill; the wide road had huge flags of the Galatasaray
Football Team flags hanging about everywhere.
Following the map, we turned into
a narrow walkway steps that went further up. All along the way, we could hear loud
cheering, and the smell of beer was generally prevalent. There were wild
graffiti on the walls and the place looked quite ghetto.
I straightaway
fitted in with my swag and my attire that would have made 50 Cent look like 50
Paise but my wife looked out of place. I told her so and was instantly
downgraded to taking the bus to office, for a week.
10:20 PM
After a rather
long climb, we finally reached the place and it was dazzling. It was the view
that reeled us; Istanbul in all its night glory. We could see the damned Galata
Tower, as well-lit as Rishi Kapoor’s costumes and looked damned gorgeous. The
inlet was dark but the lights flickered all over the city, fighting with the
stars for a place among the heavens.
We were done for
the day.
7 Museums, 1
Wall, 4 Mosques, 9 Tram Rides, 1 Ferry Ride, 1 Funicular Ride, 2 Meals, 1 Show,
2 People, 1000 Views, 2 Costume Changes, 1 Cameraman, 1 City – sounds like a
Telugu romantic film song shooting schedule. The actual route is as below, mostly.
One more day
left.
And it was the
best of them all.
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